Laughing Buddha

I've been reading Being Peace by Thich Nhat Hanh. The opening chapter is about smiling - which makes me smile just reading it. And he talks about, if you want to have a Buddha statue, to make sure it is a laughing Buddha.

I think reading Being Peace has lead me to my recent discovery that Virginia is a laughing Buddha.

Let me explain.

"God is everything" is a mantra I use often in my meditation, or any time that I need peace or comfort. It is comforting to be nestled in God's hands at every moment. In my meditations, I do attempt to understand all people, even people I find difficult, as true expressions of God.

This is a particular area of the "God is everything" concept that is difficult for me. If a person is giving you trouble it is hard to think of them nicely at all, let alone as God.

The loving kindness meditation works a little better for me with difficult people. I can find it in my heart to wish them well. And if there is some selfish part of me that hopes that if they are happy they will be kinder to me - well, I also wish myself well and perhaps if I am at my best I will be kinder to them.

My children fall into a special category. In some ways it is easy to see God in them. And it is easy to wish them well. But, I'm also responsible for them. I have to both accept them, and help them grow.

Virginia and I have had a rough week - and the summer hasn't even really started. Thursday night, while I did a workout video and heard nothing from the playroom but happy playing, Virginia and Horatio actually took Virginia's detangling spray, hair gel, and comb from the bathroom, and Daddy's scissors from his office. Virginia cut Horatio's bangs, and a chunk of her own hair.

When I ask her why she does things like this, she tells me that she doesn't mean to, she is just "too excited." This answer has infuriated me, but I've decided to start taking it seriously. Now when I see her getting "too excited," I invite her to calm down in a way that isn't punishment, but takes her off the path of impending bad choices. Once she gets overexcited, by her own admission, she is incapable of making good choices, so we might as well head it off before things get out of hand.

Virginia is my oldest. My experiment child. My daring girl, whose personality occasionally conflicts with my own. We have a lot more tough roads ahead of us. And I know that it isn't just her behavior that needs to change. The way I view her has to change, too.

Accepting her too-excitedness is a start. But even better is to see her as a laughing Buddha. I can see her as God that way - laughing. She loves life so fully. This is not a thing about her that I need to change. Redirect her energies, maybe, but not restrain.

This is an old picture. Pre-haircut.