Owning It

Having a daughter and numerous female students I think more than I used to about projecting a healthy body image.

I talk to Virginia about how amazing her body is - not just how it looks, but things it does, like growing muscles when she exercises and healing itself.

I eat lunch with small groups of 5th graders multiple times a week to discuss books. My first year I was stunned to see girls eating just a banana and bagel for lunch. I'm not sure whether they were "dieting" or just picky, but I'd like to think that I'm setting a good example by putting plenty of protein and vegetables on my plate (in healthy-sized portions).

I don't spend a lot of time on my hair and makeup and this is not as much because I am trying to make a statement as it is because, as a mother of two small children, I have better things to do - like sleep. However, it does take a level of comfort with your own appearance to go out without makeup. (Seriously? I just said that. Men aren't brave for going about their lives without colors smudged all over their faces! But that is getting beyond the scope...)

I also rarely "dress up" beyond wearing something professional. But yesterday, I did wear a dress that, accentuates my femininity, let's say. It was chapel day, so I was supposed to wear a dress and I just didn't feel like wearing a dress that is a dress but isn't dressy. I wanted to look pretty. Now, I bought this dress in England, pre-babies. I do not weigh now what I weighed then, but I felt comfortable in the dress.

Imagine my surprise when many of my fellow teachers commented on how "good" I looked. I often have trouble taking compliments and can easily fall into the excuse, to myself, of, "They probably just mean 'good' compared to how I normally look!" But I started to think about what was going on and realized that I did look good; not because my body is perfect, but because I wore that dress with confidence. I allowed the shape of my body to show a little more than usual and I owned it.

This must be a hard lesson to learn because, it occurs to me, I've learned it before and it must have not stuck. Maybe I'll get it this time and do a better job of passing it on: it isn't physical perfection that makes me beautiful (lol!), it is liking myself.